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Jul. 11, 2017

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From Dr.


From a reader: Your article (on Donald Trump) was interesting to me, but not because it had anything to do with politics.

Instead, I saw it as being applicable to relationships of all kinds, and perhaps particularly, to close personal relationships, including those with our families of origin.

In my view, if you can’t be inconvenient, at times, in a relationship, you’re not in a virtuous relationship. (A virtuous relationship is one where everyone benefits, in the long term.)

In other words, if you have to self-erase (pretend to hold opinions other than what you really believe, or to otherwise sacrifice yourself) in order to be safe in a relationship, it’s not a relationship that is truly to your interest.

Many of us grew up in homes where we could not be ourselves. Perhaps our mothers or fathers or siblings made it unsafe for us to truly be ourselves, or we were punished whenever we attempted to share our deepest thoughts and feelings. Or maybe, no one cared enough to even inquire (neglect.)

Tolerating non-virtuous relationships is a huge waste. As children, we had no choice. Thankfully, as adults, we do.

My comments:

Being authentic and real is hard for many people. They think they do others a favor by withholding their true emotions, even ones grounded in reality and defensible by reason. Then they wonder why they end up full of regret, insecurity, and even the resentment of others who feel misled by them.

If you cannot be yourself in a relationship, then you’re not in a real relationship. You’re committing a form of fraud, first against yourself and simultaneously against your loved one. While your words need never be (and never should be) mean-spirited or designed to bring down, all one’s words ought to be honest and real. And it’s not mean-spirited to be truthful.

In our political establishment, this issue has reached a bizarre and pathological level, because the whole system (both parties) is run by self-evidently corrupt deceivers. What almost nobody stops to ask is what got them there, and — more importantly — what keeps them there?

The answer is the whole lie of socialism, on which our wealth-redistributing state rests. Robbing from some to pay off others and calling it “compassion” is nothing more than Mafia-like behavior sugarcoated with what passes for morality. Put simply, you cannot foster honesty and integrity based on a system of lies and deceit. Not in personal relationships, and not on the social level, either.

What’s going on in Washington DC today is the equivalent of a relationship where the spouse or family member says, “I’m not doing this for me; I’m doing this for you.” And it’s all a lie. While we all can and must pursue our self-interests, we must do so openly and without deceit or phoniness. If our interests are out in the open and rational, it’s usually not a problem to do so.

America is falling apart at the seams. It’s happening for the same reason individuals fall apart. Contradictions, self-deceit, evasion and rationalization are hard on an individual’s psyche. They’re equally hard on an entire society.

To fix the political and social problems, we have to fix ourselves. Fixing ourselves means getting rid of the false idea that we’re entitled to anything — anything at all that belongs to another person. No more lies, no more rationalizations. No more threats, no more evasions. We are all entitled to the same thing, and to only one thing: The right to be left alone. Beyond that, society (i.e. other persons) owe us nothing.

Until or unless most of us start to get this, we’re doomed. Once we face it, then — once again — everything becomes possible.

Jul. 11, 2017
May. 12, 2017

Officials slapped

May. 12, 2017
You chose

Super Heroes

May. 12, 2017

Dirty politics: Edwin Edwards, 85, was Louisiana governor before being jailed for bribery and extortion. He married Trina, 24, in 2011

Shady business: Former New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin (right) and his attorney arrive at court in February. He has pleaded not guilty to charges of taking
 bribes and free trips in exchange for city contracts

By Daily Mail Reporter

Louisiana has emerged as America's most corrupt state with the highest rate of convictions for people in public office, official figures revealed this week. 

The Southern state came top for public corruption convictions with nine per 100,000 population. Overall Louisiana convicted 403 public officials in the past ten years.

The data was compiled by the Justice Department, covering the period from 2002 until 2011.

Florida had the largest number of convictions in the ten-year period at 618 but Louisiana came out ahead per head of population, according to Business Insider earlier this week. 

The Dakotas - North and South - came in second and third place for corrupt public figures with Kentucky and Alaska close behind. 

The lowest conviction rates for public corruption are South Carolina, Oregon, Washington, New Hampshire, Minnesota and Utah - with 1 per 100,000 population.

Corrupt public figures in Louisiana have littered the headlines in the past few years. 

Former New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin pleaded not guilty in February 2013 to charges he accepted more than $200,000 in bribes, plus free trips and other perks in exchange for helping contractors secure millions of dollars in work for the city.

Charges included bribery, wire fraud and filing false tax returns. 

The charges against Nagin were the product of a City Hall corruption investigation in the wake of Hurricane Katrina.

It also resulted in guilty pleas by two former city officials, two businessmen and a prison sentence for a former city vendor.

Nagin's trial is due to begin next month after months of delays. 

Perhaps the state's most infamous is Edwin Edwards  - who was governor four times in the 1970s, '80s and '90s - before being sent to federal prison for his role in a bribery and extortion scheme to rig riverboat casino licenses during his fourth term in the early 1990s.

Edwards, 86, married his third wife Trina, 35, in July 2011, shortly after his release following eight-years in federal prison. 

The couple had a son in August. They are also the upcoming stars of  A&E reality TV show, The Governor's Wife, due to air in the Fall. 

There are a variety of crimes which constitute public corruption, according to the DOJ report.

Election crimes covers corruption related to campaign financing, fraud and conspiracy when it comes to the electoral process at local, state and federal level.

Between 2002 and 2011, 412 federal officials were charged with public corruption in the U.S. So far, 302 have been convicted while there 110 others awaiting trial.

At state level, 93 authority figures have been charged, 143 officials convicted and 41 are awaiting trial. 

On the local front, there have been 295 public corruption charges brought across the U.S., with 296 convictions made in the past decade and 191 people awaiting trial.